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Helping Your Children Move Past The Pain Of Divorce During The Hoildays

Posted by angels blessing people on November 10, 2017 at 12:45 AM Comments comments (1)


A broken relationship with your significant other can be devastating. However, in the eyes of a child, splitting up can be equally as heartbreaking. Though divorce tends to put children through considerable emotional turmoil, it’s how you handle your relationship with each other, even when you are no longer partnered, especially during the holidays. Here are some tips on maintaining balance with your family this holiday season, in spite of a dissolved romance.


Maintain Friendship


According to American Psychological Association, at least 40-50% of married couples end in divorce in the United States. However, you can still maintain a sense of mutual respect. In fact, it’s vital that you get along because your children will always connect the both of you.


When it comes to parting ways, forming a new relationship and no longer sharing household chores, it’s a given that you’ll now lead two separate lives. However, gift exchanging, weekend visits with your children and holiday extra-curricular activities will mean that you’ll have to communicate with each other often. Though Facebook, Skype, and emails are modern forms of messaging one another, confusion often takes place, which is why you may want to obtain clear boundaries on behalf of the child.

 

Consider Your Child

 

While most children often feel as though their world has ended after finding their parents are divorcing, studied indicate that kids quickly bounce back and lead healthy lives, according to Scientific American. Though some children go through the motions of shock, resentment, anger, and sadness, only a small of amount of children suffer long-term adverse effects.


Since the holidays can potentially stir up old memories and loneliness in newly divorced couples, maintain an air of calmness so that your children aren’t affected by negative behavior. Though you may need to blow off steam, never do so in front of the children. Talking ill of the other party may cause remorse on your child’s part due to the lack of understanding, regarding the relationship between the both of you.

 

Make the Most of the Holidays


The holidays are a time to employ gratitude, love, and community. You can create a sense of normalcy by sharing holiday fun with your children instead. Frolicking in the snow with snow angels, snowball fights, sitting by a warm fire while sipping hot cocoa, writing greeting cards, or walking around your neighborhood on a crisp evening to view lighting displays are memories that your children will cherish forever, despite the separation.


It’s also crucial that you practice self-care often so that you are better prepared to deal with the stresses of being a single parent. Fun holiday activities are great anxiety-relievers for yourself and your family, but getting some alone time helps you process feelings, relax your mind, body, and spirit and boosts your self-esteem.


Talk To Your Kids

 

In the midst of all the activity, talk to your children. Get a sense of how they feel about the divorce and ways you can cope as a family. Your children already have enough stress to deal with, so show them you care by explaining the reasons for the uncoupling. Though some topics, especially for little kids, can be difficult, such as abuse, you may be general or further explain, especially when it comes to love and drifting apart.

 

Allow your children to express their feelings, be it anger, resentment towards the both of you or temporary sadness. Help them work through their emotions with a therapist, a trusted friend or keeping just between the family. Whichever way you choose to go about employing coping mechanisms, make sure that it’s done so in a healthy, thoughtful way.

 

Divorce is never easy. When it comes to your children, carefully strategizing how you will allocate your time while conserving regularity, will encourage a closer relationship, a joyful holiday season and a brighter future.



By: Alexis Hall

Singleparent.info

[email protected]

 

After Disaster Strikes

Posted by angels blessing people on October 12, 2017 at 10:45 AM Comments comments (0)

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Natural disasters like hurricanes and tornadoes, and floods can be scary for both adults and children. In an instance, your life can be turned upside down emotionally, physically, and financially. What actions do you take when faced with these situations. Do you know what resources are available as you begin to rebuild?


Most people are are aware of the help you can receive from FEMA, the Red Cross, and local churches. After you have received assistance from these sources, where do you go? Most often, there are emotional, stress, and substance abuse factors that may present themselves after these events.


When emergency events happen preschool aged children may not understand exactly what happened but they can see and sense the emotions of people around them. While school aged children and teens may understand the disaster, the younger children may have a harder time expressing their feelings. Older teens may react to the stress by acting out or using alcohol or drugs. Or they may take an active role through helping out. Youth and parents, grandparents need help to adjust to the change, loss or support to deal with new fears.


How to help your loved one

  • Answer questions honestly, without getting stuck on details.
  • Answer questions in a way your child can understand.
  • Don’t provide more information than is asked.
  • Let the child lead the conversation.
  • If you can’t answer a question, don’t be afraid to say so.
  • Emotions are okay, so encourage family members to discuss any concerns
  • Keep your family routine, it may have to be tweaked but will help create a feeling of normalcy
  • Give hugs
  • Parents should be mindful of their own feelings
  • If you have trouble with stress or coping, seek support and help.

 

Every person will handle disasters differently so look out for these common warning signs.

  • Being irritable
  • Feeling sad
  • Not participating in normal activities
  • Acting out
  • Troubling sleeping including nightmares, bedwetting and insomnia
  • Clinging to parents or other family members
  • Physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches
  • Constantly thinking about the disaster


Trinka and Sam the Rainy Windy Day is a story that helps young children and their families to talk their feelings after they have experienced a hurricane. The story describes some of their reactions and talks about how their parents help them to express their feelings and feel safer. A parent guide booklet is included at the end of the story.

http://www.nctsn.org/products/trinka-and-sam-rainy-windy-day


Sesame Street provides a support after an emergency with disaster toolkits and videos for multiple types of natural disasters. This is aimed for for younger children.

https://www.sesamestreet.org/toolkits/emergencies


Free Books & Resources

Check out these free resources to help your child to understand and handle their feelings after and a natural disaster or emergency.

The Child Welfare League of America (CWLA) has an excellent Natural Disaster Resource Guide

National Child and Traumatic Stress Network provides a free pdf ebook in english and spanish.


Web Resources

https://www.disasterassistance.gov/get-assistance

https://www.fema.gov/apply-assistance

http://www.tdhca.state.tx.us/disaster-resources/



Disclaimer: This information is a starting point and is for informational purposes only. This information is not for the purpose of providing legal or medical advice. You should contact your professional mental health specialist or an attorney to obtain advice with respect to these areas.


~BORN SUPREME :)



3 Easy Ways for Single Parents to Save Money

Posted by angels blessing people on April 10, 2016 at 8:00 PM Comments comments (1)


This April Money Smart Week is from April 23-30, so here at Angels Blessing People, we want to share with you 3 simple ways you can save your money so that you can save enough money to enroll your kids in different types of programs or so you can afford to take a family trip this summer. Stop by your local  library to pick up some books about saving money. I recommend reading, Personal Finance for dummies by Eric Tyson.

 

1. Have money automatically transfer to your savings account

 

This is a great way to save money. For example, have $100 transferred automatically from your checking account into your savings account each month, so that you can save money without even thinking about it. If you need to set up a smaller amount, saving $25 a month adds up to $300 over twelve months! You can also set up automatic bi-weekly transfers in small portions like $10 if you get paid every other week. Check your spending habits and decide what works best for you. You can also save your coins in a piggy bank or a mason jar at the end of the month and put that towards your savings account! If you pick up change off the ground it will add up!

 

2. Plan your meals

 

Planning ahead for what you will eat each meal will save you loads of money on groceries and put what you buy to best use. You’re also less likely to buy food that will go bad because of them not being eaten. The day after you make a whole chicken roaster, you can make chicken pot pie, chicken enchiladas, chicken and broccoli, or chicken fajitas. This will help you get an extra meal out of the purchase, while also helping you save time and eat healthier. Get creative with leftover items!

 

Using a planner to plan your meals every two weeks is much easier than planning the whole months’ worth of groceries. This shouldn’t take as much time so that you can carry on with your busy schedules. Click here for a free sample template that you can create your own menu with. On the side you can type in your grocery list that will correspond with the recipes for each day.

 

3. Use coupons effectively

 

If you're going to bother to clip coupons, make sure you use them in a way that saves you the most money possible. Refer to the store's weekly flyer to find out what's on sale, or check for advertisements and coupons that come in the mail for free. You can print off coupons from the internet as well. Most grocery stores have digital coupons that you can sign up for free of charge. Try them at HEB, CVS, Walgreens, or Kroger’s. If you have coupons for items, such as cereal, that regularly go on sale, wait until the sale to use the coupon. Over time, this strategy will help you save a lot of money. It is also best to save coupons for items you regularly buy so you don’t have extra clutter of expired coupons over time that end up getting thrown away.



by Sonia Sanchez

www.soniaann95.wix.com/soniasanchez

 

 

Community and the Single Parent

Posted by angels blessing people on August 26, 2015 at 2:30 PM Comments comments (1)


Parenting is hard work; single parenting is twofold. One thing can make single parenting easier. What is that one thing you ask? Building a support system you can turn to for advice, childcare, work, or personal problems or friendship. Take a moment imagine you community. What does it look like? How does it feel? Community is more than geographic locale or having shared interests. Community is having a network of people who you trust and help each other out through the good times and bad.


 5 reasons why community is a helpful tool for single parents:


 •Social Support and Connections

 Social interaction is needed for any individual to have a positive and healthy life. The busy coming and goings of single parents balancing life and family often makes building connections difficult.


 •Help 

 Single parents sometimes feel they have to do everything on their own or they have “handled their business” for so long they forget how to ask for help. Everyone needs a hand with child care, transportation, food, clothing or just a break from the kids.


 •Mentoring
 We all need someone we trust to talk to and guide us through life situations. We can find a mentor in a coworkers, family member, organization 
member etc.  Mentors can be that peace of sanity and guidance when you are facing a trying time by providing
 feedback, ideas and advice.
 
 •Energy

 Think on this, how you feel after having a positive conversation with someone. Socializing allows us to draw energy from people. Spending time talking, laughing, or watching a movie helps you to feel refreshed.


 •Confidence

 Sharing your experiences with other parents, help you to realize that, you are doing as good as any other parent. Confidence allows you to acknowledge the great job you’re doing.


 Most importantly community building for means single parents can relax and not be in survival mode or “on the grind.” In many ways by creating community, we allow our children to become more independent. Here at Angels Blessing People, we strive to build community. We are not just another organization giving handouts. We are here to help you grow by providing life skills classes, help you connect with community resources and connect with other single parents. We help to provide support and encouragement in raising your family.


 Local Meetups (Sugarland, Missouri City, Houston areas)

 Houston Single Parents http://www.meetup.com/houston-single-parents/

 Dads & daughter Running Club http://www.meetup.com/DDRUNCLUB/

Sugar Land Area Moms http://www.meetup.com/sugarlandareamoms/


BORN SUPREME :)


What happens if you die? - Estate Planning For Single Parents

Posted by angels blessing people on March 10, 2015 at 8:25 AM Comments comments (0)

Who Needs Life Insurance?

Life insurance serves to provide peace of mind and the knowledge that your loved ones will be cared for after your death. In some circumstances, it can also serve as an investment vehicle. Although life insurance can be incredibly valuable, it is not a necessity for everyone. Before purchasing a policy, it's best to think about your lifestyle and what life insurance can and cannot do; that way, you can ensure that you spend your money wisely on a policy that best fits your needs.


What Does Life Insurance Do?

Life insurance serves as a form of financial protection for the survivors when a person dies. You purchase it when you are young and healthy and pay premiums throughout your life. Upon your death, an agreed-upon value is paid out to the beneficiary on your policy. This money can be used to pay off debts, such as burial and medical expenses, or it can serve as a foundation for the financial future of loved ones left behind.


Insurance can be sold in either term or universal/whole life policies. In a term policy, you pay premiums for a specific amount of time; if you pass away during that time period, the policy is paid out to your beneficiaries. Whole and universal life policies last as long as you pay the premiums, and they accrue cash value over time in addition to the policy's face value. In other words, a portion of the money you pay for premiums is invested, allowing the policy's value to grow over time. This money is yours to borrow against or cash out before your death if necessary.


In general, term policies are more affordable, but they have no cash value. If you survive past the end of the term, you will not be compensated for the payments you have made up to that point. In many cases, however, term life insurance can be converted to whole/universal coverage at the end of the term.


Who Needs Life Insurance?

Life insurance exists for the benefit of the policyholder's surviving loved ones. If you have people who are dependent on you, purchasing life insurance can be a good way to ensure that they are taken care of after you die.

  • People who should seriously consider life insurance include:

  • Parents of children still at home
  • Individuals whose spouses rely on them for financial support
  • Single/divorced parents who are primary caretakers of children
  • Anyone who acts in the role of caretaker for another


A life insurance payout ensures that your surviving beneficiaries will have financial assistance during the difficult time after your death. It provides a cushion to allow them time to grieve and survive financially until they are able to support themselves.

There are a few other scenarios in which life insurance can be a smart investment:


- If you are a business owner or key member of a company, a special type of life insurance can help to keep the company afloat and pay for your replacement in the event of your death. When this type of policy is taken out on an employee, it's called "Key Person Insurance," and it helps to protect a company from financial trouble in the event that a crucial team member dies suddenly. As a business owner or partner, your life insurance policy can also be used to fund a buy-sell agreement to help keep the business running smoothly after your death.


- If you have a large estate, life insurance can be a powerful estate planning tool. Life insurance benefits are not subject to the same taxes as inheritance, and they are often paid out much more quickly.


- If you do not want to burden your loved ones with the costs of a funeral and related expenses, but are not financially responsible for anyone, you may wish to purchase a smaller "burial insurance" policy. These policies, often with benefits as low as $10,000, can cover your final expenses and are generally quite affordable.


For many people, life insurance offers valuable peace of mind in knowing that your loved ones will be cared for after you're gone. Although it's never pleasant to consider the end of your life, planning ahead in this way can help you and the people you care about to maintain financial security even if the unexpected occurs.


Who will care for your children if the unexpected happens and you are unable to? Do your family members or friends know how to provide for your children on a daily basis? Most probably do not know your family schedule, who needs to be where and when or that your daughter likes to sleep with her favorite stuffed bear. It is up to you to prepare for worst, and be ready if that situation were to arise. Single parents must make estate planning a high priority to ensure that your children are properly cared if you become incapacitated or die. Here are some starting points for estate planning.


Please refer to this original site: https://www.reviews.com/life-insurance/

By:Jericka Lambourne

Reviews.com

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Other Info by another blogger:

1. Prepare a will, trust, power of attorney, and advance directives.

     If you have children, then you need a will. Intestate or dying without a will can be problematic. To avoid your estate being tied up in court, make a will immediately. Your will should specify who will take care of your children and how to distribute your assets. A power of attorney gives someone the legal right to act on your behalf. Writing a will you can leave instructions for guardianship and appoint an executor.

 

2. Buy life insurance or increase benefits to ensure adequate coverage.

     How much will it cost to for someone to care for your children until they turn 18? Do you want to leave money to cover college expenses? Do you have credit cards, student loans or other debts you want to pay off? Use an online life insurance calculator to get an idea of how much you may need or talk to an insurance agent. Also do not list your minor children as a beneficiary. If you do, a court may appoint a guardian to manage these funds until the child turns 18. Remember a will or trust does not determine what happens to retirement accounts or insurance policies.

 

3. Set up a living trust.

     Creating a living trust is important because it will keep you assets in a trust; therefore, eliminating the chance it is caught up in probate. It is worth looking into living revocable trust. A living trust allows your assets to immediately be transferred to a trustee to support your children. A trust gives puts the power in your hand to determine how your assets are used to pay for living, education, medical, travel expenses, and etc. until your child is of legal age.

 

4. Choose a guardian for your little ones.

     This is probably the most important, and the hardest part of estate planning. Of course no one will care for your child like you will, but you want to carefully consider this choice. Talk to those who you are considering and ask questions. Pick someone who shares similar values and will raise your children similar to how you would. Do not be afraid to question those people you have in mind that is the only way to narrow down your decision. You may also name a guardian in a Nomination of Guardian document.

 

5. Create a resource list

     After all is said and done you still need to make a list of important contact and information to assist your loved one including legal, health, insurance, and retirement. Be sure to include beneficiary information, account numbers and policy numbers along with your list of banks, investment accounts, emails or other online accounts so they can be closed.

 

 

Resources

"The Mom’s Guide to Wills and Estate Planning"  By Liza Hanks

"Get It Together: Organize Your Records So Your Family Won't Have To"   By Melanie Cullen & Shae Irving

 

 

For more information or to locate help with planning your estate:

http://www.estateplanning.com/

http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/wills-trusts-estates

 

 

Disclaimer: This information is a starting point and is for informational purposes only. This information is not for the purpose of providing legal advice. You should contact your attorney to obtain advice with respect to estate planning.

BORN SUPREME :)

 

 

7 Things to Never say to a Single Parent

Posted by angels blessing people on February 5, 2015 at 8:45 PM Comments comments (0)

 

     Single parents have a challenging life; I am always amazed by the assumptions made about them and things that have been said to me. This post is a teaching point for (1) the single parent to understand that not every person knows how to question or support single parents; to acknowledge the intent behind the words and (2) the person who is not a single parent to acknowledge their word choice when speaking to single parents.

  

     In my journey as a single parent I have been told many things, some with good intentions other statements made from complete and utter ignorance. Ignorance may be a little harsh so let me rephrase that, people make uninformed and unaware statements. It is okay to be curious about single parenting; it’s even okay to ask questions. For single parents, a haste reaction to this situation is better approached by understanding that some comments are meant to be positive. So let me enlighten those readers who have been on either side of the situation. Here are things not to say to a single parent:  

 

     1. “I don’t know how you do it.” “I could never do what you do.” “You’re strong.” “You’re a superwoman.”

Single parents do what they have to do to provide for their family. It’s no different than married families. Often said as a compliment, this makes single parenting seem unrewarding. We do not have an “s” on our chest, nor are we super human. Given the situation, any person could do it.

     2. “You should be proud I could never do that.”

Condescending, belittling, demeaning, take your pick. I frequently hear this and it irks me like nail dragging across a chalkboard. Yes, I have two degrees, work full time and parent full time, all while working on a third degree. No need to pat my back. This statement is often made with good intentions; however, when you think about it do you make similar comments to your married friends?

     3. “You look tired.”

Really, I had not noticed I only slept 4 hours last night. Pointing out that someone looks like hell is insulting. A better solution is to offer to babysit for a few hours.

     4. “Where is the child’s Mother or Father?” or “Is their father or mother in their life?”

This is a personal question that should not be asked. If you are close to that person then you might ask differently, but tread lightly. Then again, if you were “close” then you would already know. If a single parent wants you to know then they will tell you. Frankly it’s none of your business because, gaining this information will not improve the situation rather only feed your curiosity.

     5. “Do you and your husband… (fill in the blank).”

Please don’t assume that every person with a child is married. Single parents are proud and have nothing to be ashamed of . Single parenting happens by both choice and unforeseen circumstances.

     6. “You didn’t get married.” Or “When are you getting married.”

Please refer to the aforementioned question.

     7. “My wife or husband went out of town for work so I know what you are going through.”

"This is a comment I hear quite frequently and the only one to get under my skin. Caring for you children for a weekend, a week or even a few weeks while your spouse is gone is not the same as single parenting. Let me say that again for emphasis parenting your children temporarily without your spouse (who will inevitably return) is not equated to single parenthood. The key is your spouse returned. Single parents do not get a break, nor do we get to look forward to help with that homecoming."

- BORN SUPREME :)

 

New Year Thoughts for the Single Parent

Posted by angels blessing people on December 31, 2014 at 2:40 PM Comments comments (0)

Year End...New Year

                  

      It’s the end of another year! As 2014 winds down there are several things you can do to prepare for the New Year. Before you hit the ground running and making resolutions, take time to reflect on your past years actions, goals, and progress. How do you measure up? Did you reach our goals? If you did that’s great, if you didn’t that still all right. Faltered steps do not equate total failure; it just means you failed to plan. To reach success in 2015, start by assessing your accomplishments and achievements and those you did not. In other words, analyze your actions and determine what could have been done differently. What do you want to achieve next year? What can you do differently?

     Before the New Year arrives prepare by finishing up some final tasks that will place you a step ahead. Clear your digital clutter. Start by clearing your email. Unsubscribe to advertisements and junk mail. These only tempt you to buy unnecessary items. Remember if you are impulse shopping, then you probably are failing miserably at you financial goals. Most everyone is guilty of photo hoarding. If you are going to keep all those photos organize them in your cloud drive. Same goes for all your social media account, clean up your photos and friends. It’s also a good time to revamp your resume. If you have changed jobs this year, received a promotion or taken on new responsibilities at work add it.

     Start fresh with a new budget. Take the time now to review old bank statements and bills to see where your money was spent. No time is better than the present time. Speaking of money now is a good time to make end of year donations. Take old clothes and home furnishing to the good will and do not forget to get a donations receipt. Remember tax time is impending and write offs are helpful. Donating old items will also jumpstart next year’s organization goals.

     One thing I do yearly is create a vision board. Putting goals on paper makes you more accountable for your actions. Vision boards can be simple, detailed, digital or on a poster board. Create a vision board and put your intentions into the universe. If you only make one change in 2015, then let it be planning. Create a plan whether if it’s 3, 6, 9, or a 12 month plan. Focus on the bigger picture and make it happen!

Be inspired and reflect on these quotes as you venture into 2015:

“Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.They somehow already know what you truly want to become.Everything else is secondary.”-Steve Jobs

“Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don’t have a plan.”– Larry Winget

“Life is short, live it. Love is rare, grab it. Anger is bad, dump it. Fear is awful, face it. Memories are sweet, cherish it.”– Unknown

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

-Born Supreme  :D

 

Mental Health & Single Parents (part 2)

Posted by angels blessing people on December 10, 2014 at 1:40 PM Comments comments (0)

Depression

 Have you ever felt hopeless, down, worthless or guilty for no apparent reason?  

You may be experiencing depression. Many factors contribute to these feelings including hormonal changes, family, personal, and biological. These symptoms can be acute or chronic.  

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, depression is an emotional state that extends further then feeling sad. Depression is a medical illness that affects a person’s thoughts, feelings, behavior, physical health and mood. This condition affects every person differently; some may experience one to two episodes in their life while others have recurrent incidences.  

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, about 14.8 million (6.7 %) Americans live with depression. The National Academy of Sciences reported in 2013 some 15 million children lived in households where parents have depression. Single parents are twice as likely to be depressed than parents from a two-parent family.  

A study conducted by Child Trends Data Bank indicated that in 2013 single parents reported having 1-2 depression symptoms. These symptoms were reported at a higher rate for single mothers (12 percent) compared to single fathers (5 percent) and mothers in two-parent families (5 percent). To view the full study see Resources link below.  

I cannot speak for other ethnic groups but, mental illness, especially depression is not culturally accepted in black communities. A mental health diagnosis is many times stigmatized, especially in minority communities, and carries the notion of “demonic,” “possessed,” or “unholy.” This simply is not true, mental illness and depression are brain illnesses. Depression also known as the “blues” is often seen as being weak. Many times, instead of facing judgment, women choose to keep quiet and not speak up and seek the help they need. Having a mental health issue like depression, is nothing to be ashamed of.

 

8 Effects of Depression

1. Distorts your thinking

2. Makes you irritable

3. Increased physical symptoms (aches, pains, chronic fatigue, decreased appetite, insomnia, and decreased interest in sex)

4. Decreased interest in daily tasks and things you used to enjoy

5. Recurrent thoughts or preoccupation with suicide or death

6. Weakened immune system

7. Weight problems

8. Cognitive changes

 

 Treatment  

Depression is treatable, and any person who believes they have depression should seek care from a licensed mental health professional. Depression comes and goes, but this does not mean one should not seek professional help because they feel better. Professionals offer many types of therapy and medications. Working with a qualified professional, a person suffering from depression can regain control of their life.  

Some places and people that make referrals for treatment are:

Family doctors

•Mental health specialists

•Community mental health centers

•Hospital psychiatry departments and outpatient clinics

•University or medical school affiliated programs

•State hospital outpatient clinics

•Family service/social agencies

•Private clinics and facilities

•Employee assistance programs

•Local medical and/or psychiatric societies

 

 Recommended Reading 

  • "Black Pain: It just looks like we're not hurting: real talk for when there's nowhere to go but up" By Terri M. Williams
  • "Managing Depression: What you can do to feel better" By Susan Noonan

 

Resources  

 Child Trends Study http://www.childtrends.org/wpcontent/uploads/2014/08/54_Parental_Depression1.pdf http://eclkc.ohs.acf.hhs.gov/hslc/tta-system/family/docs/depression-pfce-rtp.pdf

-Born Supreme  :D

 

Mental Health & Single Parents (part 1)

Posted by angels blessing people on November 7, 2014 at 1:20 PM Comments comments (0)

    Single parents, especially single mothers are vulnerable for poor mental and physical health. Single parents are often overwhelmed by commitments and the responsibilities of caring for their children, maintaining a work schedule and or school work, keeping up with household chores and paying bills. Most times it feels like you are running to catch up. Stress and depression are two conditions single parents routinely experience. This two-part series discusses stress, depression, and single parenting.

What is stress? Stress is the brain’s response to demands or changes. Three types of stress include Acute Stress (fight or flight), chronic stress (life tasks: bills, kids, jobs . . . etc.), and eustress (daily stress with positive associations: promotion, marriage, new friends). Stress will happen; it is how you deal with it that matters. Unresolved stress opens the door to depression and other mental health issues.

     According to the American Institute of Stress the top stress factors in 2014 were job, money, health relationships, poor nutrition, media overload and sleep deprivation. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, depression is an emotional state that extends further then feeling sad. Depression is a medical illness that affects a person’s thoughts, feelings, behavior, physical health and mood. This condition affects every person differently; some may experience one to two episodes in their life while others have recurrent incidences.

     Today let’s focus on identifying stress and tips to reduce stress factors. Stress caused from excessive responsibility needs adequate management. Single parents have higher poverty rates, especially in households headed by women. Finances are the leading stress source. It is important to take control of finances by tracking spending and making a household budget. Some banks and credit unions have apps to track your spending. An alternative is using mint.com to track spending and create a budget and saving plans. Think before you buy. Do you need that item now to fulfill a basic necessity? Chances are you can live without it. Distinguish your needs from your wants. Once you know your living expenses, then you can integrate fun activities or pleasures.

     Time flies when you are a single parent trying to cram the work of two people into 24 hours. Sure we all would love an extra hour each day and realistically it can happen. It’s important to etch out that personal time to rejuvenate. How is this possible when all your time goes to work, commuting, children’s activities and maintaining a household? Simple, just get organized and make a weekly schedule. Take an hour or two Sunday to plan the next week’s outfits and put together lunches and meals. This way you are not scrambling the night before or morning of. If possible cook casseroles and freeze meals so all you have to do is heat it up. Make lists of priorities and appointments. Once you know what you need to do it’s easier to schedule “me” time.

 

Free Resources

The American Institute of Stress

http://www.stress.org/education/

• Guided mediation E-Course

• Music Therapy: free mediation MP3 downloads

Readings Resources

• The Single Mother: Stress Less & Thrive (E-Book) By Shirelle Brown

• The Everything Stress Management Book: Practical Ways to Relax, Be Healthy, and Maintain Your Sanity By Eve Adamson

 


  -Born Supreme :D

30 day Fundraiser for 2014

Posted by angels blessing people on October 15, 2014 at 1:20 PM Comments comments (0)

Hi Everyone! :D Welcome to our fundraising campaign again... Over the next 30 days we will seek the contributions of many donors.

      We are supporting the organization "Firefighters Helping Firefighters" by walking/running in the 2014 Rudolph 5k Fun Run on Saturday December 6, 2014. If you need more information view our calendar.

Thanks,

Editor-Jenifer :P

 


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